2004-01-18 : 4:59 p.m.
I don't care what you thing


Current Song:
Current Rant:
Current Obsession:

I don't really have a clue where I'm going to start this one, but I don't know if it even matters.

I'd like to say how thankful I am for the few really close friends that I do have as well as all the others who I'm just not quite as close to. So first off, Eunice, Yumi, and Megan (even though I don't talk to you all that much anymore) that's for letting me rant when I've needed to, regardless of what it's been about. So, thanks!

I need to rant in here, but lately whenever I rant, I seem to censor myself. I really don't know why? I'm sure part of it is because I'm not the only one here; other people are reading, so in a way I'm being judged? Or I believe that I'm being judged? I don't know and really don't care anymore. I guess I'll just say what I want. If certain people have problems with that, I really don't care, just don't read. I'm not putting a disclaimer here as I shouldn't have to and I don't want to. If you STILL have a problem with that, I really don't care.

Anyway, where to begin? I really don't have a clue.

I'm back at school and would like nothing else but to be on vacation again. I'm telling you, it's Scotland, riding, and the horses that are keeping me going. That and now the plans to got to San Francisco the week school gets out to see Eunice:) I'm looking forward to that too!

That said, I can't say break was all that good. I mean it started off so well and ended horribly. As most of you know I was going to go up to New York with Susan and we planned the weekend right after New Years. Then, five minutes before she was suppost to meet me, my mom calls to tell me her mother called and cancelled because she was "sick" but more because "she never really wanted to go in the first place." I am so glad that I had had issues ordering tickets because if not, I'd have been left with a large debt because of her. My problem with all this was not so much that she didn't want to go as in the grand scheme of life, I really could care less. I have a bigger issue with how she handled the entire thing. First off, as the trip had been planned (or at least discussed) for more than a month, she had ample oppurtunity to cancel, but instead waits till the last minute? Hello? That nothing but RUDE. Especially when you take into accound the fact that I had asked at least twice that week if she was still interested in going and asked if I should order tickets the NIGHT BEFORE. She said yes. She just should have realized that her actions affected people other than herself.

Anyway, in the end I ended up going to NYC myself the next day, spent time with my grandmother before going home late Sunday afternoon. It was ok, but not what I had been looking forward to. Oh well, at least I went as that made my Grandma happy (that and my mention of going to S.F. after schools out. she says I have no choice in that and i am going.)

Where to next? Discovering that after all this Susan has blocked me from contacting her via IM was sorta interesting and actually amusing. It's not like I can't make a new screename anyway... It's just really really funny. And if not talking to me, thus losing me as a friend makes her happy, all the more power to her. Yeah it's always nice to have more friends, but it's not like I don't have any others, whether at they are at school, home, or the barn.

I originally though about ways to change what happened, but I've realized that it just ain't worth it. If she wishes to end the friendship it's her choice. That said, if she ever wishes to change that, I'm not planning on being around. She makes her choices and I, mine.

Anyway, there is one thing I still have to do, I'll do that tonight, and then over it will be, at least for me.

On a completely different note, I managed to kill myself today. I needed to get out to return books but couldn't get up the drive way cause of the snow. I shoveled most of it and still couldn't get up cause of ice. Anyway, one thing I did manage was for my feel to fly out from under me so that I could go sliding down the driveway. Now THAT hurt. I'm still in pain.

I get to ride tomorrow! Yay! No school 'cause of MLK Day so I'm picking up a private with Josie. Hey, she owes me. Riding's been going pretty well. During the last few weeks of break I took an extra lesson with Josie, but otherwise it's just been my normal Wednesday lesson. I froze to death Wednesday even though it wasn't nearly as cold as the week before. Oh well, I'm still glad to be there. OOOOH! I managed to get a neck warmer thing since scarves are annoying. It's dark blue and matches my earmuffs. Warm! Of course, I should have gotten it before this weekend. Oh well, I can use it Monday and Wednesday.

What else? I have no idea when riding with school is starting up again. Somebody better let us know when the first meeting is. Oh, talked to Krystal and Marie on Tuesday after their class and before mine. None of us are looking forward to seeing Dee so I'm glad I'm not alone. Oh well. Whatever.

I finally got a quilt for my room! yay me! That and a slip cover for the sofa. Now I just need to finish cleaning my room.

I can't wait till my camera comes. I cannot WAIT!

Ok, I guess that's it, at least for now.

My warning (not a disclaimer cause I shouldn't need one): my opinion is subject to change and if you don't like it, I really don't care. What I write is written for me, not you so if you don't like what I'm writing, then don't read. It really isn't an novel concept. Finally, if you have any other complaints, I don't fucking care.



Last Five Entries

Peter Jennings - 2005-08-08
- - 2005-08-08
night i'd not like to repeat - 2005-06-20
- - 2005-06-19
so i'll update - 2005-06-07


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